A few short thoughts for today….
“Love is the absence of judgment” ~~~Dalai Lama
It took me over 40 years to figure this out. But love and one’s spiritual journey are intertwined, whether they realize it or not. My spiritual journey began around age 36. And one thing I learned that really stood out is when you love someone, you free them. They are free to be themselves, free to make choices without fear of being judged harshly, free to pursue their passions or interests.
When you love someone, I mean REALLY, truly love them, they are free. You feel zero need to use the words “you should.” You don’t try to manipulate them to get the result you want. You don’t control them. You don’t pressure them.
When it’s this way, everything just flows. There’s no tug-of-war, no uphill battle; in many ways, no compromise needed because you are just on the same wavelength. You don’t feel the need to hide things, such as excitement over a new hobby they might judge as silly. You don’t have to walk on eggshells. You don’t need validation or compliments from others; in fact they become a turnoff most times. You don’t try to keep their attention because you know you have it, yet you are both free; free in each other.
Let me give some examples, big and small: I once made the remark how much I wish I didn’t need the amount of sleep I did to function. Dan said, “nope, don’t say things like that, because if any little thing was different, you wouldn’t be YOU.” (free to be me). Another time, I was talking about putting a large jewelry armoire in our yard sale; saying, “I have too much jewelry anyway, I should get rid of some plus this” (the armoire). Dan simply said, “why?” So simple, yet so profound….almost everyone in my life, from the time I was a child, would say at various times that I have “too much.” (free to collect what makes me happy). I have also made decisions with a retirement account I have, and although I of course discussed this with Dan, he always insisted it was money I earned and whatever I decided was fine. (trusting me to be free to make financial decisions). Obviously, this is an example because in the past, bigger decisions like these, were never just mine; someone had partial control. Real or imagined. I even had someone *try* controlling who was on my Facebook friends list; now I am not even questioned about a single thing on there. I am so free, that all I want is to bask in the beauty in what I have finally found.
People aren’t meant to be kept in cages.
I am free to finally pursue what makes me happy, whether that is a class, certification, job, or hobby. No fear of judgment, or pressure because I might not bring in as much money. If I could give young people any advice, so that relationships and marriages would actually LAST, it would be to find your spiritual path; the one that makes you feel like you are 100% home, then the rest falls into place, including finding the mate that makes you feel like you are home.
Exploding glitter box 